DAY BY DAY ACCOUNT OF MY UNSUCCESSFUL ATTEMPT AT STARTING A DRUM CIRCLE IN MY OFFICE

Monday - Made a flyer that announced my intention to start a rhythmic percussion group in the office break room. Included information on tribal drumming and suggested potential times for meeting. Also included clip art of an African looking drum and a Jesus/hippie guy throwing his hands into the air exuberantly. Handed out copies to people that I talk to on a regular basis and taped a few to the bathroom stalls. Also gave a copy to the hot intern, who seemed TOTALLY interested.

Tuesday - Forgot my drums. I am planning on bringing two djembes, a set of bongo, and some miscellaeneous hand percussion. Tried to get people into the spirit of things by starting a rhythm on the table in the break room during lunch. The beat petered out after I knocked over Julie's soda.

Wednesday - First day, very exciting. People watched with wonderment and a hint of envy as I dragged my handmade tribal drums from the elevator into the break room. As I expected, there were lots of cold feet. I strapped on the large djembe and walked around the floor for a few minutes to let people know the drum circle had begun! The lunchtime crowd was really getting into it, although no one participated. Bill from sales danced in a tight circle around me while people looked on and laughed. I think they may have been making fun of me, but it still served the purpose of breaking down the inhibition. After about 10 minutes, Andrea, the head secretary told me I had to stop. She asked if I planned on doing this regularly, and nodded seriously when I told her my intentions for a bi-weekly meeting.

Thursday - Bad day for drum circle. The lunch room was empty at noon, but I set up anyway and was able to reach a nice trance after only about 5 minutes. However, my groove was interrupted by someone throwing a half-eaten 6" Subway meatball sub into the back of my head and quickly running away. I am almost positive I know who did it, because there is only one person in this company who would eat crap like that. Don't worry, Rob, I forgive you. Determined to continue, I played only louder and more intricately. Another 5 minutes passed and I opened my eyes to see my manager and his boss staring at me. They suggested that maybe I should take the day off so I could clean the sauce and chunks of meatball out of my hair.

Friday - Came in this morning to find my desk empty, computer gone. Secretary was putting my things into a box. A large security guard was standing nearby with my manager, who brusqely informed me that I was fired. After initial shock, I asked if this had anything to do with the drum circle. He said he didn't want to discuss it. I offered to come it next week to lead the beat, but the security guard stepped in and roughly guided me to the elevator. I passed the hot intern's desk on the way out, but as I opened my mouth to speak, she spit in my mouth. Corporate Oppression - 1, Peace/Love/Harmony - 0.