How is Trey Ending Relationships?

• Hittin' and quittin' (without two weeks prior notice)
  
• Considered "distant, unattentive, and self-absorbed" to be good qualities
  
• When sordid and tragic past revealed, giggled uncontrollably
  
• Ice cube trays molested
  
• For Valentine's Day, gave folded up piece of paper that reads, "Redeemable for One (1) Free Butt Sex Session"
  
• Tricked vegan girlfriend into eating pork chop
  
• Didn't clean the cheese bowl
  

One of the the above actually happened. Feel free to comment if you know the answer or want to speculate...or add your own.